It's only a week away. The excitement is in the air. Can you feel it? It's electric. The pageantry! The celebrity! The Oscars!

I hope you forgive me if you enjoy the Oscars, but I've got better things to do than watch famous millionaires get drunk and hand out awards to each other. If you could somehow calculate how much I care about the Oscars or other award shows, the final score would be somewhere down by my credit score. 

Now don't get me wrong, I like movies, and there are certain actors who I appreciate, but my appreciation does not extend to caring about what they wear to an awards ceremony and listening to their theories on society and life. It is amazing that actors, who by definition make a living out of being told exactly where to stand and what to say are considered to be geniuses who know better than the rest of us on how to live our lives. 

Of course we can always look forward to some brave actor who will accept his award and give some political speech about this or that. And by “brave” I mean standing up and saying something that everyone in the room agrees with. It's like calling a sports fan brave from wearing his teams colors to a home game. Now, if someone where to get up and give a speech about ticket prices, or how we need an infusion of new creative talent so we don't have to watch the third re-make based on an obscure 70's TV show that was on the air for only three episodes, I could get behind that. 

But if you're gonna be brushing a wrinkle off your Armani suit because the attendant on your private jet packed it wrong and tell me with a straight face that I should be watching you in the dark because my light bulbs are killing the planet, I'll just move on. It is interesting how they never advise us to avoid television, energy hogging movie theaters, or DVDs that are made from petroleum products. Funny thing.

Or maybe, for once, I will take a famous person's advise. I'll conserve energy not by just turning off my light bulbs, but also my TV. I'll turn off all the lights, light a candle, and snuggle up with a nice (used) book to pass my evening. 

Oh, it's on a Sunday? Nevermind, I'll be at work.